Take off your hat indoors (The sliding scale of etiquette) Wednesday, April 15th 2026Tags: Hats Share Share this post Subscribe 18 Comments ||- Begin Content -|| Imagine how delighted I was, dear reader, to find that a subject I wanted to write on - etiquette in clothing behaviour - exists on a sliding scale of commonality. I love a sliding scale. Whether it's formality, colour or craft, I love explaining how a question that is often treated as binary is better understood as a gently shaded spectrum, on which we all sit at different points at different times.

Etiquette is similar, because manners are all about being considerate and respectful to those around you, so what’s considered good manners depends on those people. (Just like the question of whether you dress for yourself or others.) Personally, I hate it when people don’t take their hat off indoors. It partially obscures their face, making it harder to talk to them; it feels like they've still got on a piece of outerwear, and so might get up and leave at any moment; and it just feels odd, out of place. As you have now been primed to notice, some of those reasons are objective, some very subjective, and some depend very much on the society around us.

It’s a matter of our era. I think most people today would notice if someone kept their hat on at the dinner table, but they would have cared much more in the past. And it’s a matter of location.

A friend in New Mexico told me recently that where he is, western hats are definitely kept on during meals such as Sunday lunch. In fact the more formal the occasion, the more it’s required. Chase in a western hat.

Still, removing your hat off indoors is a fairly universal point of etiquette. Most readers will probably agree with it - it sits towards the common end of the sliding scale. What’s at the other end?

Well, a reader once castigated me for carrying my brimmed hat with the crown pointing inwards, rather than outwards. I was holding it at my side, and because the crown was pointing towards my thigh, the inside of the hat was exposed. The scandal.

I had never heard of this as a rule, and so I’m fairly confident it’s rare and rather antiquated. I guess I can see the logic - most of our clothes hide the lining and don’t deliberately expose it, in the same way shirt fronts used to be considered underwear and would be hidden by a waistcoat and jacket. That kind of thing could apply to a hat; but it’s a stretch.

The scandalous inside of a hat If those two might be the extremes, what sits in the middle? I know there’s one rule than an umbrella should be held by the handle, particularly when walking. I can see how this is more elegant and more practical - your hands are less likely to get wet from a damp canopy.

But, it’s something I rarely do because if I carry an umbrella like that, I feel formal and old-fashioned, as if I should also be wearing a bowler hat. Much as I love tailoring, I try to wear it in a fairly casual way in order to make it less showy in a society where few wear a suit and tie. For the same reason, I try to avoid accessories (such as an attaché case) that would hinder this.

An umbrella carried like a walking stick is in that vein. So I don’t follow that rule, practical as it might be. Holding an umbrella by the handle There aren’t actually many rules about the way you wear clothing (as opposed to what clothes you wear - lots there).

So it’s hard to string enough together to make a continuous scale. But I think readers will know what I mean. Manners at the dining table are similar in a way.

When I tell my children not to talk with their mouth full, it seems reasonable, as the sight of half-chewed food is so disagreeable. But it’s harder to convince them that you should never put your elbows on the table. And impossible to argue that soup should be scooped from the far side of the bowl rather than the near.

There's a sliding scale there from more instinctive and universal, to less. Perhaps like the rules about what clothes to wear, the key is understanding why the rule exists and then deciding whether to follow it. Keeping your elbows off the table will usually improve your posture - how you sit - but it’s probably more effective to keep that in mind rather than just focus on the elbows.

As ever, I’m interested in what readers have to say on the subject, but I’m particularly interested in what rules of etiquette you follow and how much you think that’s dependent on where (and when) you live. Graham's allowed to wear a hat indoors. He's a hatmaker Related postsHats with coats: A sliding scaleMarch 19th 2021 - 106 CommentsRead MoreWellema bespoke felt hat: ReviewApril 6th 2020 - 95 CommentsRead MoreStephen Temkin of Leon Drexler custom hats, TorontoNovember 16th 2016 - 34 CommentsRead More Subscribe to this post You can follow the discussion on Take off your hat indoors (The sliding scale of etiquette) by entering your email address in the box below. You will then receive an email ever